Setting limits is hard

  • Am I depriving my child from something?
  • Will my child suffer from inferiority complex — احساس کمتری?
  • I want to give my child everything!
  • Why not? We can afford it!
  • Why not help my child with homework even though she can do it herself?
  • Why not buy her an iPhone? After all, we earn for our children

And so goes the vicious cycle..

In larger scheme of things, the ulterior motive of capitalism is to make us want things we don’t need and once we have them, it makes us want something else. Children are not immune to this. Children want it all, and they want it fast.

Fulfilling their desires may feel good at first because it’s easier. Problem arises when it becomes a habit and poses a threat to child-parent relationship and disappointments. That way we unconsciously teach our children to be never truly satisfied and be always eager to buy more.

Now off course it doesn’t happen overnight. Your child won’t become a shopaholic the first time you buy her an extra Dora bagpack. But it may happen after you buy her the Dora the explorer treehouse playset, Dora the Explorer Poseable figure, and the Dora & Friends Dora’s Explorer Charms and so forth.
It’s natu

ral for children to ask for more. In such situations, parents need to hold back and let the child experience longing so they can continue to dream.

Children can’t learn values when they are given everything that in reality they don’t need. As parents we need to educate children about moderation میانہ روی and to role model how to make appropriate choices.

Children do what they see, not what they are told.

Originally published at http://childpsychling.wordpress.com on May 19, 2020.

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Consultant Child & Adolescent Psychiatrist; Co-founder & Director @synapsepk Mental Health Entrepreneur. Recycled Stardust.Balint Group.Psychoanalysis.Grit 🇵🇰

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Dr. Aisha Sanober Chachar

Consultant Child & Adolescent Psychiatrist; Co-founder & Director @synapsepk Mental Health Entrepreneur. Recycled Stardust.Balint Group.Psychoanalysis.Grit 🇵🇰